Tuesday, October 25, 2005

If you can't say anything nice...

when I was a teenager, I went through a phase of getting people I knew to give me their autograph and a little saying or witticism, in a hard backed note book. I can't remember how this came about, it might have been a fad at the time. I remember I did one when I left one school to go to another as a way of remembering those who didn't end up at the same school as me.

Anyway, one of the people I asked was the partner of one of my friend's fathers - a woman called Sarah Balfour. In my book she wrote

"If you can't think of anything nice to say, don't say anything at all".

At the time I thought this a bit twee, a bit virtuous, a bit meek. I remember thinking "huh! how boring!"

I now realise that to practice this really takes a lot of courage and determination.

It's so easy to moan, whinge, complain, bitch about people, the world. To join in on negative conversations, you know the sort of thing "Well if you think THAT's bad, you should hear what they said to me, blah blah.."

What would happen if we ALL, collectively, practiced this, just for a day? How amazing would that be?

Susan Jeffer's talks in one of her seminars about how she set a group doing a weekly workshop with her the task of not complaining for a week. When they came back, they all said they had literally nothing to say to anyone all week! To their colleagues, their families, their friends, nothing!

If you didn't allow yourself the luxury of a negative comment, a moan or a bitch - what would YOU say for the rest of the day?


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At 6:06 AM, Blogger Love but Hate said...

That's awesome!

cheating wife.

At 8:54 AM, Blogger scarlettorocker said...

Eeeek! I wasn't the first - that's good. It means that people are reading our blogs.

At 9:04 AM, Blogger scarlettorocker said...

Back again - have read your article and I chime with what you say. {eople whine for the most basic of reasons and if it doesn't actually achieve anything, why do it? It's rather sad to think that if you stopped whingeing for a week then you'd have nothing to talk about.

At 2:51 AM, Blogger Sarah Raad said...

thanks Scarlettorocker! and thanks for reading my blog, i've just read bits of yours, I think we share a common humour!

its actually hard not to whinge. I am a mega positive person but even I whinge the crap out of something once a day!! hmmm...must try harder ;-)


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